It’s Your Life, and . . . It’s Your Choice!

Everything we want to be in life all boils down to a choice. It’s our decision, and we are responsible for making the correct ones. Scary, right? So if you really want to do something or be someone -- how do you do it? What’s the key?

How do you make sure that your choice is correct? How do you make sure that you do not have to switch paths later on and have to start over from square one? There is no hard and fast rule on that, it’s a personal thing.

First and most important of all, the key is to get your mind into it. Condition your thoughts into what you want to happen. Some people say the best way is to visualize yourself doing what you want. Not just a fuzzy daydream, but a full pledged, honest-to-goodness, day-by-day kind of visualizing.

Say you want to be a successful manager – envision yourself dressing up in power suits, going to a corner office with a view, getting pats on the back for good work, speaking at conferences, etc.

It also helps to find a role model to imitate. By doing this, you have something to look forward to. It also helps you focus on your goal.

Remember, your mind is your most powerful tool. If you aim on getting that corner office or academy award or gold medal, it will show you how to get it. Whether the solution is for you to study more or practice better, your mind will direct you to it.

Other people use affirmations, mantras, physical reminders, diaries and whatever works that can remind them about their goal. Getting another person or a support group to remind you will also be great!

On the other hand, if you keep on telling yourself ‘no, I couldn’t do it’ then you really can’t. There will be tons of excuses that you can fall back on anyway.

Notice how convenient it is to just come up with them instead of aiming for something better? That’s where the power of your brain comes up again – negative or positive thoughts will influence what you are.

Look around and observe – some people walk around with an upbeat attitude and some people are known as prophets of doom. You don’t even have to ask these two how they think.

And generally speaking, don’t you notice that the upbeat ones are the ones who are successful and happy?

So, do you want to act on stage, write horror books, or climb Everest? Whatever you want, it is your choice to do or not to do it. Think hard. Then take your next step – go for it!

Dreams Seem Too Far Away Or Too Difficult To Believe? Bring Your Dreams Closer.

5 Ways to Focus on Your Dreams

How do you focus on your dream when life experiences show that you're far from it? Here are five simple ways to develop the focus that will get you moving...

1. SUSPEND YOUR DISBELIEF.
Put it on a shelf and open yourself to actually experience new ways of creating positive momentum toward realizing your dreams. The most limiting factor is to think that because something is simple, it won't work. When you buy into this, you have either just placed a tremendous bolder in front of you or veered off your path completely.

2. IMAGINE CONSCIOUSLY.
The conscious aspect involved in imagining on purpose is very important. When we're in a place of despondency and feeling the density of the hardships in life, we're imagining very powerfully, to our detriment. When our imagination is activated in this way, we get more and more of the density we want to be rid of.

Yet universal laws cannot be denied, like gravity, believe it or not, yet it's in always in action. The Law of Attraction (what we place our attention to, increases) is one such law. When you're imagining everything that can go wrong because what has gone wrong has been in your field of attention, it of course takes you backward and further away from how you really want to live.

Consciously decide to use your imagination differently, to your advantage. Imaging what you DO want without paying attention to the ABSENCE of it's existence in your current life. Imagine what it will FEEL like as though it's taking place right now, this moment. This is what being in the moment is. Use your moments wisely by deciding to imagine what it is you want, this moment, and feel it.

3. DAYDREAM.
Yes, daydream. It's a way to use your imagination,and a simple yet valuable tool to practice. Allow this process to help you build the bridge from where you are to where you want to be. People who are living their dreams have stopped listening to the voices of the past that have yelled at them for daydreaming.

It's a simple matter of using our daydreams on purpose, using many moments throughout our day, which become the respite that rejuvenates us; day dreaming renews our energy. When you daydream, make sure you're actually FEELING that life you'd like to be living. Imagination fuels your daydreaming.

4. DIRECT YOUR ATTENTION TOWARD THE POSITIVE.
This is very different and far beyond positive thinking. Deciding to look for what's positive changes your focus toward what is in your life right now that reminds you of the abundance you currently have. Directing your attention toward the positive shifts your thoughts and feelings toward gratitude rather than lack.

Finding just one thought that feels better than the last, even a little better, will help you focus on what is positive right now. Then make sure to put as much emphasis on feeling that positive aspect as fully as possible.

When your thoughts and feelings are in alignment with what you truly want, you've taken the first half of the action to move forward; the second part of the action will be steps that you take, inspired actions that you enjoy, because you have opened yourself up to inspiration that positive thought and feeling have produced. It's easy then to move forward with doing that action because you are inspired by it.

5. ENGAGE.
This means begin immediately: feel what you want to be living and practice feeling it more often. There's no need to wait; actually, this now moment is the best moment to begin; it always is.

by Gabriele Reign

Gabriele Reign is a Visionary, Relationship Coach and Author of dynamics that guide you to create and manifest the life you've always imagined for yourself. To begin creating a live you love, visit: http://www.DynamicRelationshipsNow.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gabriele_Reign

Motivation And Discipline, A Powerful Tag Team Partnership!

Motivation and Discipline - How to Make Yourself Succeed

One of the hardest things a person can do is make himself (or herself) do something he really doesn't want to do just because he knows it's good for him. Motivation is not only a good thing, it is absolutely necessary before anyone will act to do anything. Here is my definition:

Motivation
A set of psychological factors, having been met, creates an impulsion to act. An internal impelling of someone to want or be willing to do something.

That means, if someone is doing something, they must be motivated. If they are not doing it, they must not be motivated to do it, or they are motivated more to do something else. That is a fact. And that fact means that you must be motivated to do something or you won't do it. But how do we account for doing things we don't seem to be motivated to do?

The answer is what I call "Cross-over motivation".

Again a definition:

Cross-Over Motivation
The use of a motivation to do one thing to make yourself want or be willing to do something else.

An example is: you really want to date a particular person, so you ask them out to do something you don't like to do (for instance, such as bowling) because they do like to go. Here, you are not motivated to go bowling, but you use your want to date this person as your cause to go anyway. To use a crossover motivation on purpose is called discipline.

We will look at discipline in a moment, but notice that what motivates the person to act isn't the want to go bowling. There is a cross-over desire to do or have a greater good that is accomplished through going bowling.

It is a very powerful way to overcome an emotional response to something (such as disgust or annoyance) and stay focused on a more reliable approach to achieving your ultimate goals. This can easily be applied to both life in general and work.

Think about those mornings in school or college when you had an eight o'clock calculus class (or whatever) you really didn't want to attend. You were far more motivated to snuggle back up to your pillow and fughetaboudit!

But in most cases you went to class. Why? Because in the back of your mind you heard a little voice say "you've already missed three classes and one more means you flunk the course. If you want a good job (or to get into med or law or graduate school, or don't want to hear your parents carp) you better get your anatomy out of bed and into class." That is what you were trying to accomplish...not going to calculus.

Of course the cross-over motivation might have been that you wanted to do well and you knew that missing the class would not help you do it. This is still not a direct motivation to be there. If you thought it was simply a review of what you already knew and you had three free skip days left, my bet is you would have turned back over and sawed logs.

In our every day lives and at work, we often find ourselves having to do things we really don't want (an emotional state) to do, so we look for a way to "make" ourselves do them. Use this cross-over motivation on purpose. Think about what larger purpose you serve in doing this unpleasant task--how it will help you or someone else in the longer run, or hurt you or someone else if you don't do it.

Here is my definition for discipline:

Discipline
The ability to take the motivation for one thing, and focus on it as a motivation to do something you neither want nor would be otherwise willing to do.

An example is that you are so motivated to get into graduate school, that you use that motivator to make yourself study for an algebra exam tonight. You neither want nor would be otherwise willing to read algebra, but you use this alternate motivation as your impeller.

It is sometimes the job of a manager, supervisor, mom, dad, friend or counselor to remind others of the larger picture or the greater vision that can be used as a cross-over motivator. We all lose sight of our longer term goals sometimes as we focus on the immediate.

If you consciously look for cross-over motivations for yourself, and help others see the benefits of doing useful but unpleasant things, there will be a great deal more accomplished in your life and in the lives of those you love.

This is the very essence of courage, to stand up to strong emotions (such as dislike, disgust, complacency, indifference, etc.) and making yourself do the "right" thing. Try it once today, and prove it to yourself.

Cogito! You can't enjoy the Christmas lights if you don't put them up. No one likes to do what they don't like to do, but we very often like the result of doing it. Always keep your eye on the prize and forget the struggle. Nothing of value comes without it.

by Phil D'Agostino

Phil D'Agostino, the author of Naked Thinking, how to feel less, think more and make better decisions, is a licensed psychologist, author of the email broadcast E-Motivator, professional speaker and corporate trainer, personal coach and human performance specialist. See his book at NakedThinking.com and his site at BeMotivated.Com

Adapted from Phil D'Agostino's Naked Thinking

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Phil_D'Agostino

Power Beliefs - Accept Responsibility For Your Life And Take Back Your Personal Power

Personal Power Comes From Radical Responsibility

Several years ago I read a book about the power of personal responsibility, at the time the principle really didn't sink in as I was around 17 at the time and still in the early days of my personal growth studies; however several years later I came across the material again and those very same ideas began to impact my life in a variety of ways.

I have no idea what would have happened at those pivotal points in my life if I hadn't read that simple little book, but I do know one thing, being exposed to it opened something within me.

It made me aware of the enormous power I had to control my destiny and although I continued to make mistakes along my journey, I somehow found the strength to continue my quest by simply not giving my power away.

Today it is highly unpopular to take responsibility for ones life and to even tell others about it.

We live in a world where everything is someone else's fault, the government, the media, the rich, the poor, big business and even God.

The recent US election was a case in point; for almost a year people on both sides of the political divide where pointing the accusing finger at the other party blaming them for all manner of things, and in the process neither side took responsibility for any of their own errors in judgement.

Sociologists and scientists have even got in on the act by making claims that our genetic makeup is largely responsible for our behavioural and lifestyle choices.

This constant focus has created a world where no one is truly responsible for what they do. This leaves many of us in society in a very perilous position due to the fact that buying into this dangerous philosophy renders us totally powerless.

One of the fundamental principles I have discovered in my work with belief systems is the fact that the mind can only operate on one single guiding principle at time, meaning that if you believe in one thing you cannot also believe in its opposite.

If you believe that life is unfair then you cannot also believe there is fairness.

If you believe that all people are dishonest then you cannot also believe that people are trustworthy.

If you believe that it takes luck to achieve success you cannot also believe that if you work hard that your success is assured.

And if you believe other people are responsible for your failures then you cannot also believe that you are in control of your life.

This is a fundamental truth that I have seen proved again and again throughout my work, yet it is something that many of us fail to recognise.

To truly be in control of your life, you must take full and complete responsibility for every aspect of it, by doing so you will be sending a powerful message to your unconscious.

At first it may not be easy because you will still feel the tendency to blame others for the misfortunes you experience, however if you are patient and stay with it a phenomenal shift will take place as your sense of personal power increases.

Be responsible for what you say, think and do and take back control of your life! It's the only way!

by T. D. Mackenzie

T. D. McKenzie is the creator of The Mckenzie Mastery Process. Discover The Secret Word That Allows You To Erase Any Limiting Belief Permanently From Your Mind Within 90 Seconds...Even If It's Been A Part of Your Life Since You Were 5 Years Old! http://www.mckenziemasteryprocess.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=T.D._McKenzie

Win-Win Sounds Like A Great Idea But How Can I Make It Happen?

Master Success By Making Everyone A Winner

One key to helping yourself be a winner is to focus on a mindset that eliminates the element of competition. The problem with focusing on competition and making yourself a winner is that someone then has to lose.

However if you focus instead on creating a win-win situation then not only will you be a winner then your success will foster the success of others and others' success will help foster your success.

While so much of our society is focused on competition and winning at all costs, this is ultimately a very destructive mindset. A team that works together is always stronger than a group of individuals only out for their individual purposes. If you can apply this principle to every aspect of your life then you can achieve tremendous success.

The truth is that if you set up competition in most areas of your life then you lose even when you win. For example, if you "win" an argument with your spouse what do you gain and what do you lose?

Perhaps you scored the most points in the argument or simply wore down your significant other until they gave in. Now you have your way regarding your weekend plans or whatever was at stake.

But what damage has been done to your relationship? How does your spouse feel about you? How will he or she feel as they participate in the activity you won? How much damage will accumulate to your relationship if you win the next argument? And the next?

The same is true about competition in other areas of your life. If you win a competition at work then you may reap benefits in term of recognition and even monetary rewards. But if your win comes at the cost of your co-workers then not only will they feel like losers but they may well resent your success. How well will you work together as a team in the future? What will happen when you need those people to work with you on a project?

So what is the alternative? After all, no one wants to be a loser and the perception is that if you are not a winner then you are a loser. But what if you can create a situation where everyone wins? What if you can eliminate the competition? Remember, your short term win is a long term lose if it damages your relationship with your spouse, child, co-worker, or friend.

How do you create a win-win situation?

You have to keep your long-term goals in mind for that relationship which may mean that you need to remind yourself and reaffirm to the others involved that you value yourself and the other person (or people involved). You also need the maturity to strike a balance between strength of purpose and empathy.

Finally, you need to believe that there is enough success for everyone. You need to be a big enough person to understand that there is more than enough for everyone so it does not cost you to share in the success. Helping or allowing another to succeed will not diminish your success and in fact may well enhance it.

Making the decision to change your mindset from win-lose to win-win is not easy and then following through with that philosophy change can be extremely difficult. Most of us have been conditioned from early childhood to compete in every aspect of our lives.

However once you give up that competitive edge and focus on helping everyone win then you will be on a sure path to success in life.

by Dianna Mascle

Deanna Mascle shares more Words Of Inspiration and Inspirational Words at http://wordsofinspirationonline.com

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Are You Taking Action? Yes, Talk The Talk, But More Importantly Walk The Walk!

Thinkers - Talkers - and Walkers - Where Do You Fit In?

I heard an interview a couple of days before I wrote this article where the guy being interviewed said “There are three kinds of people – thinkers, walkers, and talkers…” It made me stop and think and I believe the reflections are worth sharing.

In reality, there are probably more like a billion kinds of people on this planet. I’ve never been a fan of categorization and black and white questions about “what kind of person are you”.

However…

Sometimes we need to create results in our life. Maybe it’s business, romance, or just some personal need we want to fulfill in our lives but there are definitely times when we need to plan, execute, and measure.

So for purposes of those times in life when results matter, I think it’s fair to say there are three basic types of people:

First we have the thinkers. These are the day dreaming what-ifers who spend most of their time conceptualizing, making lists, etc. some of their ideas are great but most of the time that’s as far as they get in the creative process.

Being a thinker alone isn’t going to get you much in terms of accomplished goals. Planning and writing down what you want are great steps, but these tactics are no end in themselves.

Then there are the talkers. Talkers may or may not think before opening their mouth, but they are essentially a step above folks who just plan and make lists.

These types are very interactive about their ideas and objectives. Every time you see them they have a new game plan, and an even better idea that what they were talking about the last time you met.

But as they say, talk is cheap. Sharing ideas with others, brainstorming and networking for instance, can be an very powerful part of any process but if that’s as far as you take it well… it’s not any better than just keeping your mouth shut and making notes.

And finally, for the purpose of this exercise, we have the walkers. These are the action takers in life and the people who spend the time doing and not just thinking and talking.

What’s interesting is that sometimes people think, talk, and then act. But the first two steps are not always necessary.

In reality many times a “walker” will just get up and take action before they realize they had a winning idea on their hands. I’m not trying to downplay the value of making plans and getting feedback from others on your ideas, but if you had to choose from one of the three models illustrated in this article I’d push you toward being a walker.

Trust your intuition and take forward-moving action! Don’t spend all your time thinking or talking about something you want when right now is the best time to DO just about anything on your objective list.

I’ve thought, talked, and walked a good deal in my life but when I’ve been truly inspired and really wanted something with all of my being I have found myself in motion before ever taking the time to brainstorm or chat about the issue; just something to think about.

by Tim Whiston

Tim Whiston is a full-time entrepreneur who helps small businesses and individual professionals develop a profitable web presence for their ventures. Have a look at his Website Design Service to find powerful and cost-effective solutions for your business. Also be sure to check out his Internet Marketing Blog for more great content.

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It's Never Too Late To Change Your Background. Just Look For What's Good!

Change Your Background

“No man is free who cannot command himself. -- Pythagoras

The summer of 2001 was a summer that I will always remember. It was great! We had lots of company that I completely enjoyed. The weather was hot. My kids seemed to grow about 5 inches, and the company that I had worked for, for the last 16 years was absolved and a new one created in which I became a managing partner.

At first I was excited about the change in employment, but as it started to become a reality and I was making major decisions, I suddenly realized that this was for real! I went from a small level of responsibility to a major level in 24 hours flat, and I became overwhelmed with the reality of it all. I started to lose sleep, I became a little edgy, and I don’t think that I was all that much fun to be around.

One morning while I was out for my daily run I thought, “Hold on there, big fella”, I said to myself, “You have no experience running a company like this, let alone have employees work for you. Why don’t you admit it now and get out while you still can before it’s too late.”

You know, I almost believed it. I came very close to deciding on stopping the process and going back to what I was doing before. I finished my run, sat at my desk, sweat pouring off of me and wrote the pros and cons of going ahead with this change.

The more “pros” that I wrote, the more excited I became. As a matter of fact, I didn’t even get to the “cons” side because I was too excited.

I sat then and wrote the answers to the following questions:

1. What is the problem?
2. What are the causes of this problem?
3. What are the possible solutions for me?
4. What is the best possible solution?

Sitting at my desk and going through that process was energizing me. I felt completely renewed! It dawned on me that I had reached a career goal that I had set for myself 10 years ago. I have had many goals in my career, and reached most of them, but this one was the “Mother of all goals”. I guess that I was just a little too caught up in the busyness of life to realize what had happened.

I believe that what was making me nervous, was the fact that I was focusing too much on my background than on my future. My background was not in management or serious decision-making, but in going through life every day just doing the best that I could, and leaving the heavy decisions to someone else. I had doubts because I had never done this before. I think that I was comfortable in a rut that I didn’t even know that I was in.

I see people every day who do just the same thing. They blame their lot in life on their backgrounds. They had an unpleasant childhood, or something happened along the way where they failed, and they decided that it was easier to not try at all than to fail.

In effect what they were doing was believing that if nothing is ventured, nothing is gained and the status quo remains. It was easier to blame someone else, than to accept that something happened and move on. Never taking responsibility for who they are today, and what they can do to improve on that.

The realization that I came to is that you can change your background if you choose to! How you ask? Simply by focusing on what went right.

Even in the greyness of your memories, there were some things that went right. The next way to change your background is to change your future! After all, tomorrow, when you look back on today, will become a part of your background.

The decisions and actions and attitudes that you take and have today, will affect you tomorrow, and thus become a part of your background.

If you want to achieve more in your life, but are hampered by the thoughts and happenings of yesterdays gone past, change your background by changing your viewpoint.

Focus on what is possible, not impossible. Focus on what you can do, not can’t do. Focus on your strengths, not your weaknesses. Make an action plan to carry you through the process, get a mentor and if necessary ask someone for help.

When you ask someone for help, make sure that it is someone who will challenge you and who knows the road ahead. Too many people ask the wrong people for advice and never succeed. Sometimes they ask people who have never risked anything because they were afraid of failure or change.

These people may be wonderful people, but in this case, they are not what you need. You need someone who will challenge you and encourage you and guide you along the way.

This week, as you are striving to become the you that you want to be, realize that you can become whatever you want if you will want what you will become. Do it with passion and energy, and you will achieve goals that you never before dreamed possible.

Be willing to take a risk. Afraid is good! Face the fear and do it in spite of it! That is what I am willing to do this week, what about you?

by Paul Kearley

For 22 years, Paul Kearley has thrived in the personal development and coaching business. As a Master Coach for the past 10 years, Paul’s passion is in developing and creating increased potential with both clients and other trainers. A columnist for two newspapers in Eastern Canada, and editor for his own weekly ezine, Paul writes articles that address the everyday challenges we all have and face in life and in business, and offers suggestions for success.

If you’d like to subscribe to “E-Motion” his weekly ezine, simply goto his website: http://www.mustfactor.com/ or by calling 506 433 4722.

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Once You Decide On A Goal And A Course Of Action, Do You give 100%?

In general, how commited are you to the results you want? When you decide what your goal is, and how you are going to get it, how commited are you to it's completion?

Here is a good article explaining why you must be 100% on board with your own plans. Commit to your goals 100%, and don't allow any conflicting emotions to surface. One Focus To Success!

100%

There is a certain way in which you can eliminate all of your internal self debate. I don’t care what you want, by using this method you’ll eliminate your internal debate every time. There will be no more thinking it over, compromise, doubt, coulda, shoulda or if I’d only’s.

When you put this into practice the decision is made, and you no longer have to waste energy making up your mind.

What can you do in order for this to happen?

Give 100%

I’m not talking about working hard, or giving everything you have for something. I’m talking about making up your mind 100%. If you only decide 99% you’ve left room for debate, by writing the decision as made with 100% certainty you’ve eliminated your need to debate.

Take marriage for example. If you decide 100% that you will not stray from your spouse you do not need to think about it. No matter what situation you find yourself in, no matter what ‘opportunities’ you are presented with, you will remain faithful every time. The decision was made and it’s no longer up for debate.

However, if you’ve only decided 99% then you have problems. With each new temptation comes a new debate. With every chance you’re given to make a poor decision, you must decide that time whether or not to ask.

That 1% difference is huge.

Imagine if 99% of flights were safe. Imagine if 99% of the time surgeons do a good job. Imagine if 99% of the time you took your kids to the park they weren’t kidnapped.

The results of those scenarios are disastrous. If you want to protect your life, and your children’s lives you’d want to make sure that each of those above scenarios are perfect 100% of the time.

Missing 1% may seem small, but if it was you that had a botched surgery, a crashed flight, or your kids were taken from you–that 1 % ruined your life.

If you’re losing weight, make it a 100% commitment. Turning down cake after dinner is easy if you’ve already made your mind up.

Want to make more money? Turning off the tv and working toward your goal is easy, no matter what’s on if you’ve determined that no matter what you’re going to do it.

Improving yourself? Check.

Being a better parent? Check.

Being a better spouse? Check.

Being a better person? Check.


Decide today what you want, and make your mind up 100% that you’re going to have that.

By eliminating that self debate you’ve had in the past, you’ve freed up a ton of energy to focus in on what you actually want!

by Josh Bickford

Josh Bickford has found his purpose, and it's YOU! He has written a book just for you--and it's FREE! Be sure to claim your copy at: http://magnificenceblog.com/free-stuff/setting-your-goals-so-you-reach-for-magnificence

Never settle, always reach for magnificence!

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Sometimes Bad Things Happen To Good People, How Will You Handle Bad Days?

RESISTING THE SIREN’S SONG OF THE VICTIM STORY

So... you think YOU had a bad day, huh? Last week I...

...had my new car stolen
...found an error requiring me to pay $2500
...got news that my Grandfather had been involved in a horrible accident
...had to file suit in court due to another's wrongful actions

Think I'm making this up!? Nope. It all (er... and even more bad news) happened.

I'm not writing this to make you feel good about your life, poo-poo your challenges or even garner sympathy for my plight... Nor is there going to be any "well... life goes on, there's a silver lining in those clouds" kind of moral here, either.

What will happen in any of these circumstances? Dunno. But the larger insight has been not to give in to the siren's song of "the victim story."

Time and time again on TLS I see people locked in to their victim story. No matter what they do, something bad happens to them. Others are doing bad things to them. They're *trying*, it's just that... (fill in the blank with some thing, someone, some something that AGAIN victimized them).

But... I'm not a victim. Nope, not even of the auto theft.

It's said that one of the toughest realizations every person comes to in becoming an adult is the realization that no one else is going to take care of you. If it's to be... well, it's up to me. And, if you get locked into the victim story, well... you get lots of sympathy. But you sure don't get much power OR change.

You had a hard life? Well, what are you going to do about it!?

Stop taking pride in your victimization. Stop holding out your complaints and the wrongs others (life?) have done to you. NO ONE IS COMING TO YOUR RESCUE.

The life I'm living is mine. It's the way it is, from a myriad of actions and decisions that's brought me to this moment. Responsible for other's actions!? Nope. But, no matter WHAT anyone has done "to" me... I am responsible – FULLY responsible – for my life.

I'm responsible for where my life is, for what protections I've put in place, for what insurance I've put in place, for what resources I've build up, for what friendships I've built to call upon, for what money I've saved....

... Or not.

Sympathy begets sympathy. And, if you're to keep receiving your daily allotment of it... you'll need to keep the "poor me" stories coming.

Don't get me wrong: it's not that bad things are not happening to you. They are. After all, my car WAS stolen. My Grandfather did suffer a catastrophic accident. Another has wronged me to the point that it was necessary to file suit.

But the question is WHERE IS YOUR POWER? And, it certainly is NOT in what's been done wrong to you.

This is life. More to the point, this is YOUR life. There's no sense resisting. Things simply are as they are. There's nothing in that, that means that you can't work to make them better. But, in the mean time, drop the victim story. The sympathy you'll get for it is not worth the cost it takes on your soul.

Your answer is your power; your joy; even, what comes "easy" even when your car was stolen and your Grandfather placed in the hospital.

I'm not a victim. I'm the victor.

For today, drop your complaints, drop your victim story. Do not complain about another thing in your life, for today. This is simply the life you've made yourself. Even if someone else did something to you. No one else is coming to your rescue; no one else is going to take care of you. You don't need them to. You'll figure this out on your own. And, you'll do it, because... you're not a victim.

You're the victor. Even if you're still figuring it all out along the way.

by Mark Farmer

Reprinted from http://TotalLifeSuccess.com – the Web’s leading success community featuring inspirational quotes, success articles, and tools to improve your life. To subscribe, visit http://totallifesuccess.com

How Do You Talk To Yourself? Are Your Thoughts Normally Positive Or Negative?

Positive Self-Talk

One of the most powerful influences on your attitude and personality is what you say to yourself. It is not what happens to you, but how you respond internally to what happens to you, that determines your thoughts, feelings, and your actions. By controlling your inner dialogue, or your “self talk,” you can begin to assert control over every part of your life.

Your self-talk determines the majority of your emotional life. The words that you use to describe what is happening to you, and how you feel about external events, will trigger the emotions of happiness or unhappiness that you experience.

When you see things positively and you look for the good in every situation and in each person, you will become a very positive and optimistic person. Since the quality of your life is determined by how you feel moment to moment, you should make it a habit to only think and talk about what you want and keep your mind off of what you don’t want.

You are constantly faced with challenges, difficulties, and problems every day of your life. They are unavoidable and one of the inevitable parts of being human. But as you draw upon your resources to respond effectively to each challenge, you grow and become a stronger person.

When you look back over your life, you’ll see that you are the kind of person that you are because of all the difficulties and problems that you have had to overcome in your life. Without those setbacks, you could not have learned what you needed to know to developed the character and strength that you have at this point in your life.

Much of your ability to succeed comes from the way you deal with life. Having a positive mental attitude is indispensable for success and happiness. It is the key to success in business, and it is vital to building strong relationships with other people.

Everyone wants to be around a positive person with a cheerful attitude towards life. But no one wants to be around a negative person who is always pessimistic about everything. Your ability to develop and maintain a positive mental attitude, no matter what the situation may be, will play a critical role in any success you achieve.

One of the best ways to define a positive mental attitude is having “a constructive and positive response to adversity.” It is only when you are confronted with a setback or adversity that you really know if you have a positive attitude or not.

Anyone can be positive when things are going well. It is only when things are going against you, that you are able to demonstrate to yourself and others, that you have a positive character and personality.

One of the common characteristics of all high achieving men and women is that they recognize the inevitability of temporary setbacks and disappointments. They accept them as a normal and natural part of their life. They do everything possible to avoid problems, but when they come up, successful people learn from them and rise above them. They continue to move forward towards their goals.

Optimistic people develop the habit of talking to themselves in constructive ways. Whenever they experience adversity of any kind, they immediately describe it to themselves in a such a way that it looses its ability to trigger negative emotions. They are able to exert a sense of control by how they describe any event or situation to themselves.

There is a natural tendency in all of us to react emotionally when our expectations are frustrated in any way. When something we wanted and hoped for fails to materialize, we feel a temporary sense of disappointment and unhappiness. We feel hurt and disillusioned. We react just as though we had been punched in the “emotional solar plexus.”

A person who is positive and optimistic is resilient and bounces back fast when he or she encounters a problem or setback of any kind. He or she responds quickly to an adverse event and interprets it as being temporary and only external.

An optimistic person takes full control of his or her inner dialogue and counters any negative feelings by immediately reframing the event so that appears positive in some way.

Since your mind can hold only one thought at a time, either positive or negative, if you deliberately choose the positive thought to dwell upon, you keep your mind optimistic and your emotions positive.

Since your thoughts and feelings determine you actions, if you keep your words and thoughts positive, you will automatically be a more positive person and move more rapidly toward your goals.

It all comes down to the way you talk to yourself on a daily basis. When a problem or difficulty comes up you must learn to change your language from negative to positive. For example, you should learn to use the word situation instead of problem.

A problem is something you wrestle and struggle with. It represents a potential loss and difficultly. A situation, on the other hand, is just something that you deal with. The event is the same. But the way you interpret the event to yourself is what makes it sound and appear completely different.

An even better word to substitute for problem is the word challenge. When you are faced with a difficulty of any kind, instead of saying, “I have a problem,” you should say, “I have an interesting challenge facing me.”

The word challenge is inherently positive. It is something that you rise to and that makes you stronger. It is again the same situation, only the word that you are using to describe it is different. As a result, your emotional response will be different as well.

The best of all possible words for any event or situation is the word opportunity. When you are faced with a difficulty of any kind, instead of saying, “I have a problem,” you should say, “I am faced with an unexpected opportunity.”

Within ever difficulty or problem, there lies the seed of an equal or greater opportunity or benefit. If you focus your attention on finding out what the valuable lesson is, you will always find it.

You should start your day in front of a mirror saying affirmations, such as “I like myself,” “I am the best,“ and “I can do it.” These are personal and positive affirmations that will build your levels of self confidence and self-esteem. You should say these affirmations out loud in front of a mirror at least 50 times a day.

By doing this, you will be driving these new positive thoughts deep into your subconscious. At first when you do this, you’ll feel kind of funny doing it, only because your mind over many years has been programmed with so much negativity that it will take time to reprogram your mind with these new positive affirmations.

The hallmark of the truly successful and happy person is the ability to be objective and unemotional when caught up in the inevitable storms of daily life. The high achieving individual has the ability to continue talking to himself or herself in a positive and optimistic way no matter what the situation is.

They are always calm, clear, and completely under control. As a result, they are able to exert a far greater sense of control and influence over their environment, and are less likely to be angry, upset, or distracted by problems or difficulties.

The starting point of becoming a more positive person is to monitor and control your self-talk every minute of the day. Keep your thoughts and words positive and consistent with your goals. Keep your mind focused on what you want and on becoming the person you want to be.

Remember that it is impossible to learn, grow and become successful without adversity and difficulties. You must rise above them in order to become a better person. So, welcome each difficulty as a learning experience and look into the situation to find something good or beneficial in it.

Always, keep your thoughts on your future and on your goals. Constantly think about the person you want to become. When things go wrong temporarily, respond by saying to yourself, “I believe in the perfect outcome of every situation in my life.”

Resolve to be cheerful and pleasant in every situation. Resist every temptation to respond to a situation negatively. View disappointment as an opportunity to grow stronger, and talk to yourself and others about it in a positive and optimistic way.

When you practice positive self-talk, and keep your words and your mental pictures consistent with your goals, nothing can stop you from being the success you are meant to be.

Copyright© 2005 by Joe Love and JLM & Associates, Inc.
All rights reserved worldwide.

Joe Love draws on his 25 years of experience helping both individuals and companies build their businesses, increase profits, and achieve total success. A former ad agency executive and marketing consultant, Joe’s work in personal development focuses on helping his clients identify hidden marketable assets that create windfall opportunities and profits, as well as sound personal happiness and peace.

Read more articles and newsletters at: http://www.jlmandassociates.com

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The Six P's Involved In Proper Goal Setting Strategy

How To Set A Goal In 6 Easy Steps

We’ve all set goals in our lives, some have been accomplished, and others have been broken. Although a number of variables plays a part in whether or not a goal is achieved, a sound goal setting process is integral to creating the momentum required to succeed.

Regardless of what your current short term and long term goals are, in order to achieve them you need to have set them in a manner that will guarantee your success.

These are the ‘six Ps’ that will teach you how to set a goal you will always achieve.

1. Be Precise
Your goals need to be precise. How much money do you want to make in your business over the next year? Where do you want to be with your career in five years? What countries do you want to visit over the next few years?

You need to know exactly what it is you want to achieve. More importantly you also need to set a deadline for when this goal must be accomplished. Without this time component there is no sense of urgency to achieve the goal, and you might just compromise by thinking you’ve got plenty of time left, only to realise that the opportunities to progress have passed you by.

You must know exactly what you want and when you will achieve the goal.

2. Know The Purpose
Once you know what your specific goal is, you must understand the purpose behind why you want to achieve this goal. Setting a goal to become a gazillionaire one day is nice and dandy and all, but if your reasons are not strong enough, then they will not get you through the difficult times where you need to fight just that extra bit to succeed.

What are your reasons for achieving your goals? Why must you achieve this specific goal? Your reasons need to be emotional; they need to get your heart racing, your blood rushing, and your toes twiddling. In a word, they need to get you pumped! If that goal and the reasons for pursuing it don’t get you excited, then it isn’t something that you really want to achieve. It’s just something that seemed like a good idea.

Make sure that the purpose behind your ambitions gets your adrenaline pumping each and every time. These first two steps alone will get you half way to achieving your goals, but by no means does that guarantee you will achieve them.

3. Always Be Positive
Your goal also needs to be said in a positive manner. Rather than setting goals like “I want to be financially free be the age of 30 so I don’t have to work for somebody anymore”, or “I will not lose money in this business this year”, or “I will not look like an idiot, again”, restate these goals in a positive light.

Instead say, “I want to be financially free by the age of 30 so I can play golf everyday and visit remote countries”, “I will make x-amount of money in the business this year”, and “I will show them how it’s done, yet again.” Give yourself the best possible chances of succeeding, by pursuing the goal with a positive attitude, rather than a limiting attitude.

4. Create Parts
Additionally when you set a goal it needs to be broken down into parts. Your goal is the end result, but what will get you from where you are now to where you want to be? You need to be able to set sub-goals and objectives over a shorter period of time, which will allow you to progressively achieve each aspect of your dreams.

These are the checkpoints that you must pass through to ensure you reach your desired destination. If you want to become filthily rich through your business, you need to set a financial target for the end of the current year, the following year, and onwards, as well as the activities you will perform to acquire these riches you so desire.

5. Get It On Paper
Having to set a goal and keep it in your head can be a disastrous activity; we all have brain cramps from time to time, so you need to write your goals down on paper. There is something magical about writing your goals on paper; only about five percent of the adult population in most developed nations takes the time to write their goals down.

If you are in this percentile, or you want to join in on the fun, you are setting yourself up for success. This small percentage of people who actually think deeply about their goals, and takes the time to write it down on paper are also the people who achieve great things in life. Make sure you are one of them.

6. Take Action In The Present
The final step you need to take in this goal setting process, which actually is more a beginning than a finale, is to take action in the present to move you towards your goal.

After you’ve sat down, thought about your life, thought about your goals, thought about your dreams and ambitions, had a brain cramp or three, and managed to jot it all down on paper, you need to do something, anything, now, that will prove to yourself that you are serious about achieving this goal, and you will relentlessly pursue it until you achieve it.

Do something right now to move you closer to where you want to be, and start to create that momentum that will take you towards your goal.

These six steps are integral to your success in setting a meaningful and achievable goal. You need to be precise with your goal and the purpose of achieving it. You need to be positive about your goal, and after you have broken the goal down into manageable parts, you need to take the time to write your goals down on paper. Once you have accomplished these steps, you must take the first of many actions to generate the momentum that ensures your success in achieving your goal.

by Simon Lim

Want to learn more about the power of setting and achieving goals? Want to find out more about how you can maintain your momentum while chasing your dreams? Want to develop an unconquerable mentality for success?

Download your free copy of the '501 Greatest Quotes Of All Time' at http://www.rubama.com/ and gain greater insights into how you can ensure your success in life.

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